Birthday Behavior – 30 on 30💕🎉👑

“I’ve found that luck is quite predictable. If you want more luck, take more chances, be more active, show up more often.”  — Brian Tracy

*screams internally*

Waking up in Costa Rica on this 30th day for my 30th year is a blessing in itself. May every year of my entire 30’s begin in a new destination as long as Allah grants me the will to do so 🙏🏽. May I never take the luxuries I have access to for granted. May I embrace every new experience and cultivate it for the enrichment of my life’s journey. Amen!

For the first time ever, I don’t want to be as vulnerable. Yet, I promise to always remain transparent. I’ve always written from my heart and shared the things I’ve experienced and what I have learned most from my previous year of birth. However, this year, I feel it’s time to move in a different direction. Becoming more private and embracing my life – the bad and the good alone, in hopes that it will block outer interference and push me to new levels and truly grow. I’ve been going through my saturn return since January and with 5 more months left – as my life continues to transform, I just want to be quiet. The battle I am facing with who I am as a person, how I feel, what I want and what I need, is not open for discussion with anyone else other than God and myself. There is still something I am in search of. I don’t have all the answers and to be honest, I don’t know what that something is. I know I carry myself with dignity and grace, but I promise I don’t have it all together. When you see me, understand, I am still trying to figure life out just like the next person. I didn’t even know who I was until a few years ago and now I don’t even feel like that person is me anymore. There are parts of me that have been sleep and I can’t play with time any longer. 🗣I NEED TO WAKE THE HELL UP! I felt fulfilled months ago and now the thought of being complacent is terrifying. Comfort has become scary to me because I never want to settle for the bare minimum. It’s time to move larger in life; make something more of myself; give more of myself. I’ve come so far and have accomplished so much to be where I am today, but I know there are things I need to be honest about and change within myself before I can transcend to this next level. I’ve slipped back into some old behaviors and I refuse to not learn the lesson, fail the tests and repeat the same old cycles.

On the flip side as I have gotten closer to this day, I’ve taken heed on how confident I am within myself. I spend way more time by myself nowadays. More often than I used to. I move at the beat of my own drum every single day and work on my own time. There is not one other person’s company I currently crave more than my own. I am at my most peaceful state when I am alone. Self love has become my main priority. There are so many things about me that I love, but there are just as many things about me that I am discovering that hinders my elevation. This period has been conducive to helping me identify with and shedding those behaviors.

“Calling yourself out on your own bullshit is primary self-care.”

– Ayishat A. Akanbi

To the people that have been patient and understanding with me as I grow through this next phase, I thank you so much. Your grace has been a lesson in itself. I pray that you are more pleased with the improved and healed me that is awaiting to greet you on the other side. Cheers 🥂 to 30: All the preparation is going to finally pay off because God is…!

***BONUS***

30 Life Lessons I’ve Learned In 30 Years

  1. Everyone is growing. You either grow with or outgrow each other.
  2. Meditation will change your life.
  3. Never be afraid to ask for assistance. We can’t do it all.
  4. Learn to accept constructive criticism without feeling attacked.
  5. People will say a lot without any action for as long as you accept it.
  6. Not everyone deserves access to your love.
  7. Your comfort zone is a dangerous place. Never remain complacent.
  8. If you’re not passionate about it, is it really worth the time?
  9. Longevity is key.
  10. Know your worth + add tax, and never compromise it.
  11. Continuously learn. You never know what doors a new skill will open for you.
  12. Look good and smell good, but don’t forget your confidence. It’ll take you far!
  13. Read often and watch how your vocabulary naturally advances.
  14. Experience is life’s best teacher.
  15. You can’t avoid setbacks but no matter the circumstance, you can bounce back.
  16. Learn the lesson to avoid repeating the test.
  17. Resilience/Dedication/Consistency will pay off. Don’t ever give up on your dreams.
  18. Don’t rush life trying to beat a time table. God has the final say.
  19. Be flexible.
  20. Spontaneity in moderation is a thrill worth feeling.
  21. Be honest with yourself and own your shit.
  22. Healthy love is the only option. Don’t let them convince you of anything less than.
  23. You can’t predict the future but you can take the necessary actions to create it.
  24. There is nothing wrong with seeing a therapist.
  25. You can’t change anyone other than yourself.
  26. Life goes on.
  27. People will pick apart your truth no matter what it is. Rumors/Opinions don’t deserve your attention.
  28. Self care is a necessity. You need time to recharge often.
  29. Never place your happiness in the hands of someone else.
  30. Everyone has their own definition of loyalty. Make sure you are knowledgeable of theirs.
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2017 Year in Reflection

This year has felt like a lifetime. Everything accelerated within a twelve month span. But had it not been for the tools that the previous years equipped me with, I wouldn’t still be standing confidently today. If I had to think of the biggest lesson I learned, it would be: 2017 taught me to stand in my power. I learned the truest meaning of independence and self confidence.

Thankfully, 2015 taught me to be fearless. With that characteristic, when a new opportunity presented itself to me in January of this year, that was something I’d never done before, regardless of whatever, I found the courage within myself to push through. Being forced completely out of my comfort zone with the new opportunity helped me to realize that I am someone I never knew I was. My self confidence is now on another level. Definitely a breakthrough in knowing that on the other side of fear is self discovery.

2016 taught me to be proactive. This became a benefit to me in August of this year when I felt as if my life was in shambles. There’s always an angle that I have thought of so just in case, I can cope and persevere through effortlessly. Everything that could go wrong DID go wrong in August, but it taught me the art of letting go. Whatever the universe was doing, I wasn’t fighting it this time. Let the chips fall where they may but I will always be alright.

As proven, in fact, I was alright. By November, life had turned completely back around and having the right attitude was beginning to pay off. Here it is December, and my opportunities are constantly flowing in. My heart is grateful because the truest lesson of opposition has taught me that I’m unbreakable. I have overcome so much in the last 8 years that the problems I face now, I handle effortlessly.

That love that I used to gloat about all 2016 and halfway through this year? Well, it went stale! Nothing bad happened. We’re still cool and he’ll always be a love that changed me forever. But I definitely learned a new lesson with love: there’s no such thing as right person, wrong time. If the timing is wrong, so is the person and you can’t live your life on pause for the timing to align. Two years of that bliss feeling but just because it didn’t turn out the way I thought it would doesn’t mean it didn’t serve it’s purpose. Ultimately, I think the lesson of meeting him was to show me at a time where I thought I’d never be able to move on to anyone after my previous love, is that my heart could still feel “bigly” for someone else. He’s still one of my favorite people to have known, and although our friendship might be distant, the memories are forever. No matter how your heart feels, make sure your mind is never clouded by it. I was so quick to label this relationship as a “life partner” or a “soulmate” when the timing of life just proved that it was a “karmic relationship”. The lesson from that is, you still don’t know the purpose of someone’s existence in your life and you can’t really define it until you have had a quality amount of involvement to look back upon.

Currently, my focus is on nurturing my career. So much to look forward to. I accidentally fell into my purpose at the end of 2016 while I was working a career that has been in my blood and I am so good at. Here I am now, juggling two careers, two different lanes and yet thriving in both. My income is now tied to purpose and passion and it’s honestly the greatest feeling.

Astrology keeps hinting at this time of my life being golden for partnership and marriage. I want to believe it but I’ve gotten way too excited too soon recently. If marriage & kids are for me, then I’ll gladly accept that role when the time seems fit. But where I am internally, even if the universe doesn’t see that, that life is for me, I am also at peace with it. I’m not desperate, rushing a biological clock or timeline because what I won’t do, is settle for bad decisions. I have learned to release control of what things “should” be and accept life for what it is. I’m not going to stop living my best life no matter what cards are dealt to me. This is my happy currently and it’s peaceful while I’m playing my hand to its fullest extent!

In retrospect I learned that I am a very powerful visionary and my level of determination is legendary. I became a new me in 2015, so as we are hours away from a new year, a better me is awaiting. I’ll still love, still laugh, still give my all, still maintain my peace, still travel, and make sure i’m guided into intelligent decisions, just on a progressive level.

May 2018 be a life evolving year in a positive way for us all ✨

How to be Mindful in your Daily Life

1. Allow and accept the different feelings you experience – knowing these will change throughout the day.

2. Don’t judge yourself for having negative feelings.

3. Don’t believe every thought that pops into your head. Some of these are true, but many will be false.

4. Slow down and take life at a manageable pace.

5. Stay in the present; do one thing at a time.

6. Let go of the need to control everything.

7. Practise being curious; notice little things.

8. Use your 5 senses to become more aware of what is happening all around you in the world.

9. Nourish and take care of your body and mind.

10. Practice contentment and gratitude.

 

source: unknown

Mind-Form

“Academic excellence is not gifted, it is earned. Knowledge is not a nebulous substance that enters you via osmosis, you have to acquire it and keep it, integrate it, make it yours. The mind is not something that is, but something that has to be actively formed.”

Premeditated 


I was shocked and excited when I came across this goal list of things that I wanted to accomplish this year the other day. Mainly because after I wrote it, I forgot about it and never looked at this list again. However, I managed to have crossed off 7 1/2 of these resolutions off my list. Crazy right?! Perhaps there is some truth in manifestation when you simply put things out there by writing them down. Or is it because these things were actually important to me and they never left my mind?  I’ve never done a vision board but now that I know the effect in writing a list, possibly seeing my list visually on a daily basis will motivate me to go harder.

1. Before 2015, I never saved money. I’ve always lived check-to-check. My savings account maintained the bare minimum to keep it open at a credit union that was too many miles away from home. So I never used it. After examining my finances and budgeting, I’m proud to say that I save in multiple accounts for their specific purposes and have already exceeded my annual goal.

2. Vacations aren’t even a question in my book. After traveling 10 out of 12 months in 2014, the least I aimed for in 2015 were three trips (since I’m financially responsible now and all) but I’ve surpassed that as well. Isn’t it funny what all you can accomplish by depleting the unnecessary spending.

3. Multiple sources of income is still under development. I am still fine-tuning my dream business and I haven’t yet ventured into the stock market, but I’m going to get there.

4 & 5. I’ve improved my credit tremendously and I’m the most happy about that. You’re as good as your name and in America, credit speaks for you.

6. I did not relocate unfortunately, but now I’m not so sure if I want to move back to Los Angeles. That’s still a pending thought. I may have to reascend that one.

Ahhh, #7 might be the scariest because at the time that I wrote this list, I was in a relationship. It’s almost like I planted the seed of getting out of an emotionally toxic situation and knew that I was going to receive better once I did. Needless to say, shortly after I listened to God and finally ended that relationship, I met someone who I know is perfect for me; my soulmate.

8 & 9. I eat so much healthier. I still splurge weekly but I’m not as reckless with it. I also started back doing yoga, playing tennis again and I’ve tried cycling.

10. Lastly, improving my skin is pending. I’m still experimenting with regiments that will be most effective for my oily skin. Some things have worked but only temporarily. Hopefully I can get this fully under control soon.

So, you see I encourage everyone to write down your short term and long term goals and take them seriously. I think the key is to make your short term goals reasonable yet effective. Your long term goals can be more far-fetched because they will take time to acquire. For instance, a few of mine are: to own a horse, yacht & private jet. See! Lol!  Meditate on your goals regularly and make an effort to work towards them. Don’t procrastinate. Start acting on them as quickly as possible. A year moves faster than we think and you never know what kind of progress you’ll have made. Your thoughts run your life. Although, I forgot I made this list, I didn’t need reminding because these were things that were important to me and I thought on them regularly. In closing, change the way you think, because action starts there. A great mind’ll change your life!