Forgiving yourself is as important as forgiving others. Guilt is toxic, re-living the mistake over and over. Love yourself. Forgive yourself.
I always have these conversations with someone extremely important to me and I’m often astounded by how deep they get. Our latest, had me thinking about how every person’s story, especially those who have never had anything easily handed to them, is just an accumulation of what is needed in their journey to achieve their level of greatness. Sometimes, when I look at strangers, I always wonder, what is his/her story? When you see someone who has much success or seems to have it all together, it’s easy to compare yourself, but rarely do we consider what occurred in order for those accolades to come into fruition. It’s often surprising what you discover when people open up and you have those conversations. That’s why I never understood being jealous of what someone else has. Don’t let their level in life allow you to become envious of their blessings. Sometimes, those blessings just might not be God ordained. You can’t wrap yourself up in someone else’s representation of their life. You can see me today and I might appear confident and headstrong, but I promise this mindset did not always exist. I used to find my security in what I had. It took many adversities that almost broke me to learn that “things” aren’t everything. I really hated myself for so many mistakes that I made under 24 years old. Although, I had many fun moments while going through my mess, I also went through extreme self critical moments in private. I’m not going to lie to you and say that I no longer want things and I don’t work to buy them, but what I will say is that my purpose isn’t in acquiring anything. Therefore, my approach to obtaining said things, are no longer done with self inflicted pain because there isn’t a superficial reasoning behind it.
I know what it feels like to have nothing. I know what it feels like to have a lot. I know what it feels like to lose everything. I know what it feels like to start over. And over. AND OVER. I know what it feels like to build from the bottom. I know what it feels like to be setback. I know what it feels like to struggle. I know what it feels like to overcome losses. I know what it feels like to be lost and find myself, only to lose myself again. I’ve been through enough to know that there ain’t nothing in life that you can’t overcome. And although life is still going to get in the way, with the experiences that I have had, I can be at peace knowing that if I fall however many more times, my ability to always bounce back will allow me to end up in positions 10 times better than the previous. It’s just all apart of the process. Nothing great has ever been created without passion and resilience. I thank God, that I don’t look like what I’ve been through. Many of us don’t look like the struggles that we’ve overcome and the ones we are currently battling. Shit happens. Every day and to everyone and you have no idea what a person had to endure to get to where they are at. The difference is always in how you choose to deal with whatever comes your way. Understand and believe in the concept that you can literally become anything you want and take those adverse situations as an invitation to reposition, recreate and rebuild yourself.