Independence & Freedom

“Maybe some women aren’t meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free until they find someone just as wild to run with them.”
-Carrie Bradshaw

I was always told that I run away from my relationships. I have such an independent spirit. Giving up my freedom to a man who feels as though he owns me is terrifying. I’m such a lover and I love the act of being in love, but in that love, the ideal situation is not suffocating. I don’t like following rules or being told what I should or shouldn’t do. And the same goes for a relationship. I rather just be me as I allow the man to be himself and being accepting of each other’s differences. If there is communication and trust present, shouldn’t you feel secure in knowing that your mate will respect your relationship no matter how they choose to think, speak, or act? I’m a carefree person at heart and if you know me, you know I move at the beat of my own drum. I don’t do what everyone else is doing, I don’t do what is expected of me. I do exactly what it is that I want to do, when I want to do it. I’m a real nonconformist.

I’ve felt trapped in relationships because of the way that the guy would always try to control me or for lack of better words, tame me. As a result of this, I’ve always had to separate my love life from my social life. It almost felt as though I was living a separate life and then I’d come home to this relationship. Basically, I always needed an escape from the relationship. I am both introvert and extrovert, and both sides are on the extreme ends. That extrovert part of me is what the men in my life have attempted to control and has only caused me to pull away, more and more; causing a drift between us. If I have to be away from the relationship to be my truest self, I’m only going to seek that route more often than not. Which creates distance. The ideal situation to me is exactly as the quote above says, I am not meant to be tamed. The guy for me will run freely, embracing a soaring view on life with me. Two independent and free souls, merging together to take on life while we build, expand and have all the fun doing it together.

My new guy is a limitless spirit such as myself. We have free-form rules, meaning there are none, the options are endless; it’s all based on what works for us two and our bond at any given moment. I doubt this, but even if we were to never marry or last a lifetime as a couple, I’m keeping him in my life forever. He’s really my best friend. And as he’s welcoming me into his world, I never feel constricted nor constrained by him. As important as it is to maintain your own identity outside of a relationship, I think it’s just as healthy to be able to share parts of your world with your mate and vice versa. Confidence has probably been the major quality we both possess that makes it work. It’s just so easy between us. I’m optimistic on how together, what we will create with our equally expansive and imaginative existences.


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